Ask Dr Nerenberg | Health and Fitness

What would you do, if this is happening to you?

What would you do if you’re partner has depression and you tried everything with her, medication, meditation, nutrition’s, going on, joking, leaving her alone … everything.
Please keep in mind that depressed people hurt others. She accuse me of things that are not true, by accusing how I’m thinking, what I would do, blaming me for any bad thing that happened, take the parts from conversation that if she ads up can make the story a disaster and me a devil. Then later when she gets better maybe after a month continuous of this, she would come and say sorry and she doesn’t know what she was saying or how she thought like this and admits that something is wrong with her for a few days and then we start again with depression.
She’s my wife and we have 2 kids. What to do???
and what would you do if she thinks she doesn’t have a problem and doesn’t want to go to doctor or take medication?

I know it might be hurtful, but she’s your wife, so hang in there. Try really talking to her when she apologizes; when she’s in her ‘depressive state’, she will be very reluctant. Make sure she knows that you’re hurt and that this is affecting your marriage. Let her know that you still care for her and only want to do what’s best for her, but that she needs to open up to you to find out what it is that you need. Make sure she realizes that you are not placing any blame on her, but that this is just to get her to realize that there are people out there who do care for her. You mentioned that you had kids; how are they dealing with this? Talk to her about this too; how is this affecting your kids?
If that doesn’t work, I would suggest finding professional help. But before you do, make sure she understands that it is because you want her to be better, not because you think she’s crazy and/or depressed.
Good luck.

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