Ask Dr Nerenberg | Health and Fitness

emotional blackmailing.. how do i repair the damage??

My father was diagnosed with cancer in 1997.
he is generally in good shape. still young (50-something). on&off treatment depending on his results.
I am 25 now. but ever since then, my mom has been emotionally blackmailing me. always pulling the your-father-is-sick card.
i studied medicine (under her pressure) when i didn’t even want to.i refuse, however, to deal with his condition.instead, i answer all his questions. take good care of him (in terms of massages and nutrition and nursing his cold every now and then).bottomline, i do what i can do without having to deal with his sickness. because simply i don’t want to know. i don’t want 2be informed &because it is too painful for me 2do so. i’m an avoider.
and because i’m a doctor, my mother makes sure she lets me know how big a disappointment i am. she wants me to be his doctor. she wants me 2give him his meds, join his appointments &all.
am i the bad guy here?am i insensitive?
why do i feel that she’s insensitive 2my feelings?

Sometimes, it takes distance. I do agree with the first person that it would be innapropriate for you to be your father’s doctor. Further, I think that you should consider limiting your contact with your mother if you feel that contact with her is detrimental to your mental health.

Maybe some time apart is something all of you need. If you want to appease her, try having a talk with your father’s doctor. Let your mom know that you convinced the doctor to notify you of any changes in your father’s condition.

Most importantly, if you do not like medicine, consider another field. There are many jobs you can take a medical degree to that are.. somewhat different from ‘traditional’ doctors fields.

Sports Medicine.
EMS Office of Emergency Medicine
Research

…or, just do something that you enjoy more. No sense in being a doctor if you do not like it.

Daniel Vitalis: Indigenous Nutrition & Physical Evolution 2/6

Lane Labs, Sunspot ES – 14 gm $29.95 Lane Labs, Sunspot ES – 14 gm…

The Paleo Solution: The Original Human Diet $9.98 “I am a firm believer in The Paleo Solution. I maintain a hectic schedule that starts early and finishes late. Filming a television series, maintaining my fitness, and being a mom can be harrowing some days. Since adopting a Paleo way of eating I look and feel better, and I know that I am setting a good example for my daughter.”—Eva La Rue, star of ‘CSI: Miami’”I have watched as The Paleo Sol…

The Vitamin D Solution: A 3-Step Strategy to Cure Our Most Common Health Problem $6.99 The world’s leading expert on vitamin D reveals the missing link to achieving optimal health Vitamin D deficiency is the most common medical condition in the world. In America alone, over 200 million people lack sufficient levels of vitamin D and may consequently suffer from chronic health conditions, ranging from daily annoyances like fatigue and pain to life-threatening illnesses such as diabe…

Nutrition: The Cancer Answer II $0.01 This landmark publication details numerous and powerful nutritional weapons that can be employed in our ongoing war with cancer. Discover the Bio-X cancer prevention diet, the alternative physician’s protocol, and information on the latest alternative therapies for preventing and dealing with with specific cancers. Still twenty years ahead of traditional cancer research….